A Moving Experience

 The 145 pound, wild haired Bubba reaches into the refrigerator and hollers, “Hey, Clem, I found two pieces of pizza. They smell OK. Want one?”

“Sure, bring me a beer too. Look, there’s an ad in this here paper, Monty’s Mobile Home Park, says it has inexpensive rentals. Hey. Bubba, let’s check this out.”

“Ya, why not Clem.”

“Shall we invite Judson?”

“Nope, he gets cranky quick. Has a bad temper.”

Three days pass. The fifty-year-old buddies relocate once again. Bubba and Clem move their sparce belongings into the 8’ x 30’, 1956 vintage, worn out trailer.

They unpack their 22 rifle, 30-06, BB gun, air gun, shot gun, over and under, M16 rifle, 9MM hand gun, AK-47 for rabbit hunting, extra magazines for all of them, fifty three boxes of ammo, two sweat shirts, one spare pair of levis, two pairs of boots, three pair of socks, four old T-shirts. A well-worn Texas star hat, two cups for coffee, two pans, one skillet, one tin plate, one chipped plate, four forks, one hunting knife, two sleeping bags, five six packs of beer and a bag of chips.

Now, settled in, they watch the Rodeo on TV, and enjoy a few beers.

“I smell smoke.” Clem looks lazily at Babba, expecting him to figure out what’s going on.

Babba sniffs the air. “It kinda smells like propane. Do we have a leak?”

“Don’t think so, but I’ll check around.”

Clem moves his large frame slowly off the couch and checks the tiny kitchen, no odor around their stove. He bows his head to look out the low tiny window to see next door.

“I guess everything’s alright. There are two guys next-door that have a hell’va fire going in a barrel. I still smell propane, though.”

There is a bang on the front door. It’s Judson.

“Hi Jud, come on in.”

“You didn’t give any forwarding address. It was tough finding you two. What’s up?”

“We had a chance at cheap rent so we grabbed this palace.” Clem said with drops of beer slobbering onto his beard. A button pops off his shirt where it had covered his expansive belly, rolls off and lands in the crack of the sofa and is left there.

            “You didn’t invite me? I thought we were tight.”  He paces the floor. The trailer jumps with each step he takes.

“Sorry man. Wanna beer?”

“Hell no, I want answers.” He stops in front of Babba and points his shaky finger against his nose. ”Why did you leave me out of this deal?”

“Hey, there are only two beds and were not that friendly with you.”

Without warning Judson up and leaves. Slamming the door behind him.

“Glad he’s gone. Good thing he took his nasty mood with him.  Seems he’s been drinking a bit too much today, too.”

Within moments gunfire explodes all around them. A bullet comes through the front of the trailer right above the sofa to the left of Clem and slams into the side of the refrigerator, missing Babba by inches. Another bullet comes through the front window whizzing past Babba on his left and Clem on his right, scattering tiny pieces of broken glass across the room with the bullet exiting through the wall just past the sink. There are more bullets fired. Clem nonchalantly brushes the glass off the sofa with a rag that was next to him.

They aren’t aware two men that had been standing over a barrel fire next door are seen four blocks away, running like hell and screaming to the top of their lungs.

Babba says, “Sure is lucky he’s using a single shot or we would have bought the farm.”

Fortunately their trailer suffers no more wild flying bullets.

The propane bottle in the back of their pick-up truck is shot, explodes, and bolts into the air like a rocket with flames out the back. It crashes down in the neighboring driveway, the fire extinguished by the propulsion. The truck has a hole in the bed from the propane tank and a hole through the cab. It’s got one flat tire, but seems to have otherwise survived.

Their trailer lifts up with the explosive impact and settles a little crooked and a few inches back from it’s original position. Then all is quiet. No more propane smell either, now.

They hear Judson’s truck race away.

Sirens are whaling not far off.

“Geez seems Jud was pissed off more than usual. Want another beer?”